Anyone Want Some Fried Brains?

So, you hear that sizzling sound? Yeah. That would be my brain after several hours of studying and research and essay writing. So it’s 3am, and my thoughts are wandering.

In my perfect world, it would always stay between 10 and 23*C, the men would always wear suits and hats, formal tea would always be served at 3pm, heterosexism, homophobia, racism, and other forms of prejudice wouldn’t exist, Milady and I would always have time to spend together, and when I said things, people would listen because they realize that I’m brilliant.

Oh yes, and there would also be lots of rain, and glitter, and black lace, and sexy boots. And I would have the ability to turn back time. Not to undo my past mistakes, no, no–just so I could get some fucking sleep.

You know, the more I think about this place, the more I like the sounds of it. Could someone please find a way to FedEx me there? I’m small–I’m sure if we got an extra-large box, I’d fit.

I think this goes without saying, but as we live in a world of rampant asshattery, please allow me to state for the record: this is my intellectual property. As such, please do not copy, circulate, edit, alter, take credit for, or otherwise appropriate this material without my express permission. Thank you.

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