The Wake-Up Clock

This is for all the other nocturnal beings out there who understand exactly what I mean when I reply to “Good morning!” with “It is morning, ergo it is not good.”

4am—Doesn’t Exist o’clock
5am—Royally Fucked o’clock
6am—Insane o’clock
7am—Ass o’clock
8am—Stupid o’clock
9am—Barf o’clock
10am—Grumpy o’clock
11am—Acceptable o’clock
12pm—Good o’clock
1pm—Happy o’clock
2pm—Bliss o’clock

I think this goes without saying, but as we live in a world of rampant asshattery, please allow me to state for the record: this is my intellectual property. As such, please do not copy, circulate, edit, alter, take credit for, or otherwise appropriate this material without my express permission. Thank you.

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